...Scraps-n-Drafts...

- I missed an opportunity today to really help out a co-worker...I had come out of the bathroom, unisex, and her schedule for nature calling was just behind mine I learned...She said hi, I mumbled the same, I'm more of a nodder, and my hi was distorted by my brain trying to finish its debate over whether I should warn this co-worker about how the person before me peed all over the seat...before my brain finished the debate she had entered the bathroom...and then the next debate started, "Is she going to think I peed all over the seat?"...well, I left, I think, the seat up, so no, she won't think I was the one...I did leave the seat up, right?...

- Not Yoko said, "Oh, he's really going to write that down"...she said this after I said, "Stop digging your back into my elbow...oh, that's good stuff...I should write that down"...I got up to get the notecard I had written the above "pee on the seat" story on, leading her to say, "Oh, he's really going to write that down"...what is it in my mind that makes me believe I should write these thoughts, I call them "ideas", down?...is it my confusion about me thinking I could possibly one day be a writer?...I already am, I'm not?...and does that confusion come from the sleep deprivation?...or was I delusional to begin with?...those are questions to forever ponder, and I'm sure this freckled soul will...but for right now, let's focus on what else I wrote down on that notecard...oh, and by the way, I had said, "Stop digging your back into my elbow" because we were lying in bed and, well, her back was digging into my elbow...

- The joke about this being more like "Monthly Nuggets" is hilarious...hilarious enough to spark a whole new blog of your own...good luck with that...

- Actually talking to ones gut to make decisions in life..."The talking gut"...

- Dissect "Illegitimate Child"...show picture of baby and confirm, "Yes, it's not legitimate"...

- "Who describes a sitting person as tall?"...

- Open up art gallery with children drawings and show people discussing them in the ridiculous way "they" discuss "real" art...

- Things women think of that men never would...like, "I want to have a dinner party"...why as a guy have I never thought, "I'd like to have at least 8 people over and feed them all"?...I have enough trouble feeding myself, forget feeding the faces of my friends and their "partners"...partners?...apparently another law firm has been established...

- Conversation about her pimple hurting and me saying, "Your constant conversation about your pimple hurting is hurting me"...

- "It sounds like the dishwasher's on...but we don't have a dishwasher"..."Yeah, what is that sound?"..."It's the dishwasher"...

- Everybody wants to tell you how busy they are...like you have time to participate in a conversation about how busy somebody else is...apparently they aren't that busy if they have time to discuss how busy they are in a conversation...listing everything they have to do...oh my god!...

- Start writing "Resume"...movie idea I had, and will have again...idea about people being interviewed but using their "real" resume instead of the bullshit ones we all create...

- I was laughing and she asked, "Are you ok?"..."Yeah, I'm laughing"...

- "Do you want to go to the store with me and get stuff to make a fruit salad?"...the idea that somebody would ask me that is hilarious..."Yes, I was sitting here hungover and was thinking I really want to go to the store and get ingredients for a fruit salad"...she's still asking me about the fruit salad as I type this...and I still really want to go to the store and get those ingredients...no, I really do...

- "Oh, I thought you cut that toenail"..."No, well, we've had a good run...might as well keep it going"...